eK! is electronic Kabalen, a web-exclusive Kapampangan journal of ideas

wilfrido david
wilfrido david IT'S A crazy world we live in. But it's the only one we have, pending discovery of other possibily inhabitable planets. Yes, we have earth people alleging to have been abducted by aliens (and I don't mean illegal aliens) and taken for a ride in UFOs, examined and experimented on (like our own doctors do on paid live patients or cadavers), and then returned back none the wiser for the experience. It's been more than 50 years since an alien spaceship was said to have crashed in Roswell, New Mexico, the state where I live in. The claim is still the bone of contention between debunkers and faithful believers. There was a government cover-up, much like in our own NBN-ZTE deal, "Hello Garci," fertiler, and AFP scandals. The difference is that the US government didn't want to waste time and money by launching a senate investigation because there were no whistleblowers nor eye witnesses to contend with. No alien showed up to volunteer valuable information, they all died in the UFO crash. Which is just as well, the government isn't going anywhere with its senate blue ribbon committee investigations either. Incidentally, because of this UFO crash-landing, Roswell put New Mexico on tourist destinations in Southwest USA.

Now, wouldn't it be nice if, indeed, there are beings other than us in outer space? Let's fantasize just for amusement's sake! Enterprising Filipinos will lose no time putting up recruitment offices for jobs in, let's say, Planet X. We will not only be known for our OFWs but UFWs (Universal Filipino Workers). Regardless of the universal exchange (X's currency against our peso), Filipinos will still line up for jobs. And, of course, we will have to learn the language as well, which, imaginably, will be close to Kapampangan. The culture, personal values, and the food will also be Kapampanganish—salty and greasy cuisine. The employer planet's fastidious ways—creased pants, shiny leather shoes, starched-ironed shirts, and pomaded hair and all will be akin to Kapampangans.

Quite possibly, Kapampangans will introduce jueteng and other forms of gambling there. A sari-sari store on every corner is not a farfetched idea. By gosh, we can send Rico Puno (the singer) as our ambassador. There is no limit to what we can do to promote Kapampangan culture, including our "mayabang" male demeanor. Many roads, avenues, and thoroughfares will be named Macapagal Blvd., Dimatulac St., Sapangbato St., Bananaque Rd, etc. The possibilities are limitless. The only problem is the transportation to get there, what with the price of fuel such as it is.

Let's snap our fingers and get back to the real world—the world we live in and are stuck with.

What is happening in the Middle East? Suddenly, the Middle East is in turmoil! "Tripolites" want to depose their long-time leader, shouting "We don't be-Libya anymore!"; "You have lied to us all these years"; "You are straight when in fact you are not only crooked, but gay as well."; "You have deprived us of towels and blankets, while you use those for your 'casual' wear—you think you are a fashion trend-setter?"; "What ever happened to your general's uniform heavily laden with medals that only you know what wars you have fought in and what good deeds you have done to merit wearing them?!"; "You have more names than anyone can ever hope to spell right: Gadafi, Ghadaffi, Khadafe, Kadafee; yet only one fits you to a tee: "Daffy-Khadafi" (with apologies to Walt Disney)!"

First, Egypt, then Yemen, then Iran, now Syria! Why do these people think that democracy as we know it is a better form of government than theirs? Well, maybe they want to have the American Dream, too. Owning a house with affordable mortgage or, perhaps, owning a beautiful late-model car. Acquiring the latest electronics and iPads or APads, and fancy cellphones that are hardly used for calling anymore but do much else on the internet, including picture-taking and video streaming. And emailing! Did I mention texting? Their women are probably tired of hiding their beautiful(?) faces behind veils, or their bodies hidden under saris (blankets?). Are they secretly pining for hamburgers that only look palatable in the ads, or just plain disillusioned with living in an oil-rich country and not benefitting from it? How unhappy or frustrated are these people compared to the Filipinos with regard to their government leaders, and how, seemingly, only the rich can enjoy God-given rights and privileges? After all is said and done, that is, their complaints attended to, their wants granted, and finally achieving the life-style they could only dream of—there would still have to be riots, demonstrations and the killings that go with it. Suffice it to say, it's human nature. If it's not a crazy world, how else would you describe it?

On the homefront: "Lagot si Ligot" is the appropriate way of reporting what's going on with the senate investigations. Ligot and his wife are as defiant as the husband caught cheating on his wife. When asked questions, he or she smirks, "I invoke my (fifth amendment) rights on the grounds that what I say might tend to incriminate me." He was detained last week at the Senate premises after he was caught malingering, together with his wife, to avoid being embarassed further by the relentless questioning. I can only admire the questioners for their forebearance, which really is nothing compared to the Ligots' nonchalant demeanor. Col. Rabusa could only sit in his lonely corner and flare his nostrils while looking at the ceiling. Heavy drama, suspensful turns, verbal calisthenics, suppressed martial arts blows, a lot of emoting worthy of a suspense movie. Hours and hours of questioning, and the usual suspects keep looking at the time. They know full well that wheels of justice turn ever so slow (even as Merceditas is on the hotseat with no guarantee that she will ever be found guilty, impeached but not convicted.)

The prodigal son has returned. Ping Lacson came back with a bang, looking hale and hearty, just like someone who has just been on a world tour! Layla de Lima, the DOJ head, who was not exactly in wild anticipation that Lacson will eventually show up, looked nonplussed. She has been in government too long not to know that high-placed people can get away with their shenanigans. Ping Lacson wanted to be accorded a special kind of dispensation for being a senator. He seemed to have gotten it, but it doesn't speak well of his character, both as an individual and a public servant. He turned his back on his duties and responsibilities and yet he is welcomed with a red carpet by his colleagues. At the end of the day, one wonders what happens now to the murder case filed against him? Make way for another senate investigation! If it's not a crazy world, I don't know what it is!

It's heartwarming to note that former enemies can join in alleviating the plight of the Japanese earthquake victims. The Americans were the first to offer help in all forms (money, services, food, rescues, perhaps even rehabilitation), which only goes to show that goodwill can go a long way. It lifts the spirits of the downtrodden, and reaffirm the tenet of "peace and goodwill towards men on earth." It goes to show that I am only partially right about the world being a crazy place to live in.

Therefore, I offer half a mea culpa... humbly. Take it or leave it!


[About the author. Wilfrido David first retired as Computer-Analyst from the Ayala Group of Companies. He immigrated to the US in 1985, worked there for another 25 years in the Medical Field (Medical Lab Tech), until he retired for the second time. Sometime ago, he was involved with FAANM (Filipino-American Association of New Mexico) as correspondent-contributor-writer-editor, publisher—all rolled into one. He says about that stint, "I ran out of energy, patience, and money but kept on with my duties until the next set of association officers were voted in." The earliest writing he did was for his high school paper in Holy Angel University. His present writing derives from the perspective of a Filipino expat in the US who faithfully keeps up with what's happening in the home country, as gleaned from his Filipino channels on DirecTV, aside from CNN and HLN.]

-Posted: 12:02 PM 4/2/11 | More of this author on eK!
Nextnext